How do you breath?

So you need a little help getting rid of your stress . . .

Getting enough oxygen into your body is essential in order to remove toxins from your blood. Insufficient oxygen increases muscle tension and anxiety. Abdominal breathing elicits a relaxation response.

Below are some tips to develop deep breathing which will in turn reduce generalized stress.

How do you breath??

To determine if you breathe with your chest or abdomen, place your left hand on your chest and your right on your abdomen. Your pinkie finger should be just above your naval. Take a deep breathe and notice which hand moves more.

If your left hand moves, you are breathing shallow with your chest.
Chest breathing results in air being sent to the upper lungs where there is less capacity which results in shallow breathing.

If your right hand moves over your abdomen, KUDOS TO YOU . . . you are breathing abdominally, taking in sufficient oxygen with each breath! Abdominal breathing elicits the relaxation response we need to be able to control how we handle stress.

I need help!

To practice breathing abdominally, imagine your body is a balloon. Take a deep breath through your nose. With each inhalation, imagine you are blowing up a balloon. The air comes into your body and your abdomen (the balloon) begins to expand outward. When you exhale, the abdomen (balloon) releases the air. You should try making each inhale/exhale come through your nose.

Relaxation exercises must be practiced regularly to gain the benefits it has to offer. Reading about the techniques does little good unless you put them to use. To begin to form habits, start out spending 10-15 minutes twice a day practicing these exercises.

Make this time a reward for yourself ~ look forward to it.

Is it time to call the doctor?

Do you get sick frequently? The American Institute of Stress estimates that 75 - 90 percent of all visits to primary care physicians are for stress related problems. There are many signs that stress is causing physical as well as mental and emotional disorders ~ muscle aches, low back pain, insomnia, headaches, heart palpitations, irritability, frequent colds, trouble learning new information, change in appetite and jaw clenching are some ways stress manifests itself in your body.

But wait, before you panic, all stress is not bad!

Stress occurs when there is a challenge in front of you. Positive stress occurs when you react to something that creates pleasure or excitement, these are stimulating challenges. Negative stress occurs when you perceive the challenge is difficult, dangerous or painful.

What do you do to control your stress?

During a response to stress (flight or fight response), adrenal glands secrete corticoids (adrenaline, epinephrine, nor epinephrine) which inhibit digestion, reproduction, growth, tissue repair and immune and inflammatory systems. This could have negative effects on your body.

Relaxation response usually turns off this stress unless you accumulate many smaller stressors, in which case it could lead to stress related diseases. Research shows that many people hold their stress in a preferred system. For some it manifests itself in muscle tension and fatigue, for others it may affect the digestive track.

Know your body and how it reacts to stress. With awareness and attitude you can help to overcome much of the stress that attacks your body.

Who's in your inner circle and why?

Do you like who you’ve become since you have started that new school? Since you’ve gotten that new job? Since you’ve become part of that group?

Remember your parents telling you not to hang around with that crowd or that you couldn’t go to that friend’s house? Why?

According to Jim Rohen, self-made millionaire and successful author, take the average of five people you associate with and that represents, in a nutshell, who you are!

I like people. I think people, by nature, are good. I seek to find the good in others. I find myself wanting to emulate those who have become what I want to be ~ those who are nourishing, positive and uplifting. Others’ attitudes are contagious. Why spend time with those who will bring us down. If you do not like who you are becoming, then take a look at who you are associating with.

I choose to associate myself with people who are inspiring and motivating. In surrounding myself around these people, I can “catch” their positive attitudes and change how I feel about myself and events around me.

What are the qualities you admire most in others? Take a look at the people around you. Do any of them possess these qualities? Are they in your inner circle of friends? Who are the successful people in your school, team or job? Have you ever asked them the secret to their success?

When you associate with others who are successful, you can “try on’ their strategies and see if they work. If not, move on and try another!

Choose who you become by choosing those you spend time with.

You are in control!

We don’t have control of everything in our lives, so that which we can control should coveted!

Events occur throughout each day that are out of your realm of control. Although you can not control how or when something may happen, you can control how you will react to it. The events themselves are neither positive nor negative. It’s our reaction to them where we assign these perceptions. Take the following events for example . . .

You’re stuck in traffic . . .
You missed your plane connection . . .
Your boss lays into at you at a meeting . . .
You’re laid off from your job . . .
You lost a business deal . . .

Although you can’t control when these circumstances occur, you can control of how you react to the situation. You have a choice. You are in control of your response.

Possible outcomes to situations are a direct result of the situation and your reaction to them.

Although being laid off from your job or losing a business deal may originally be perceived as completely negative, ask your self some questions to find out how you can turn your negative perceptions of these events into something more positive. Remember, you have control over your response.

Perhaps losing your job will give you the push you needed to take a step outside your comfort zone. Maybe you will open a door that will allow you pursue your passion.

Things happen for some reason, but unless we are open to looking at how we can view these as something positive, we will never know what lesson we were supposed to learn from a particular situation.

My head feels funny

So, you say your child doesn't "do drugs"? They must be good kids . . . you don't' have to read this . . . WRONG!!

How do we stop young kids from ending their lives early? As a former high school teacher and parent of two young children, I have decided to define a drug as "anything that makes your head feel funny". Think about it, when kids are young, they like to spin around in circles ~ why? . . . it makes their head feel funny. Have you been to a baseball game or high school pep rally where kids (or adults) have to spin around a baseball bat then try to run straight? Why can't they? Because they are dizzy ~ their head feels funny.

So, I guess its okay to make your head feel funny??

"Good" kids don't do drugs do they? What is something that kids ages 9-16 are choosing to do instead? Play a game ~ the choking game , no big deal right? They won't get in trouble because its not a drug or alcohol, it's just a game. WRONG!!

Kids are playing this game because they think it's just that, a game. I urge you to read more about it. Most parents of children that have played this game and "lost" (died) are not aware of this until it's too late.

There are so many things that kids do that parents are not aware of. Please, be aware of this before its too late. View the Games Adolescents Shouldn't Play video at GASP video

Find a penny, pick it up!

My good friend and business mentor, Barbara Giemza, told me a great story that I wanted to share. . .


Years ago, a friend (now husband) was discussing with Barbara whether or not he should leave his job in corporate America to begin living his passion and working on his own. As they were discussing this, they found a penny on the ground. Barbara, a believer in fate, picked it up and thought that was interesting. As they continued walking and talking, they found another one! She commented on it and picked that one up too. Barbara didn't share this, but thought it meant something. After finishing their conversation, they each went their separate ways. On the way home, they each found another penny. When they spoke that evening, she told him she beleived that there was a message behind the findings. . .

Do you wake up each morning looking forward to the day ahead? Do you know you're in the right job/career? Are you passionate about what you do?

Barbara's message was simple, if you follow your passion, the income will appear as easy as finidng a penny on the street.

Firm, but not too hard

What do you do at an interview to make sure you stand out among the others? Wear the right clothes? check Research the company? check Review your resume for errors? check Take out all your body piercings? check

As soon as you walk through that door, you are being judged and your body language tells a story! What is something that is unique to you?

. . . Your first impression ~ a good handshake!

A first impression is made in less than 30 seconds. Like it or not, that's all it takes. Many people do not realize that to change that impression, it takes 20 additional contacts to be made with that person before their perception of you changes.

Let's not be reactive and try to fix a poor first impression, let's be proactive and teach young people at an early age how to create an image of themselves that puts them ahead of many others. Many people perceive those with a strong, solid handshake to be more confident and have better interpersonal skills.

What if you're not confident? You can fake it if you have to!

No one needs to know if you're nervous or not, it's simple . . . when meeting someone for the first time, maintain eye contact, shake his/her hand firmly, but not too hard and use their name, or introduce yourself. It's that easy!

Remember, you have the power to set your own stage ~ make it stand out!

Ready, set . . . . . go??

When did I become an Educational Consultant? I thought that day was January 17th 2008. That was when I decided that I was going to make a change. I was going to follow my passion by empowering teens with the skills they need to be successful in life. I talked a good talk. I got my hands on every book I could that would help me form a business. I went to seminars, read stories about avoiding the pitfalls of starting your own business, read motivational books, subscribed to blogs, etc.

I was getting everything ready so I would know exactly what I was doing! Does this sound familiar? You know how it goes. "Okay, I'm ready to formalize the business . . . oh, I have to fill out that paper work first. Okay, I'm all set this time . . . but, what happens if I don't get as many people interested in my service that I hope to. Maybe it's time to research this a little more." Blah, blah, blah.

Does that sound familiar?

Ready, set . . . . . . .okay ~ ready . . . . ready . . set . . . . JUST JUMP!!!!

I found that I was waiting until everything was just right ~ things had to be perfect. Well guess what, in order to succeed, you need to learn from your mistakes, and in order to learn from mistakes, you need to make mistakes. To make mistakes, you have to put yourself out there first! So when did I become an Educational Consultant? The day I put myself out there with no net to catch me. I decided to resign from my full time teaching job on my birthday, July 10th 2008. I was talking to my mother on the phone and continued to talk about what I wanted to do, but not knowing how to make it happen. When I got off the phone, I turned to my husband and said, "I really want to resign from teaching". He said OKAY.

What?? Are you serious, just like that you say go for it? I came up with all the reasons it might not be a good idea. I was playing devil's advocate, but he was in my corner and told me to go for it.

I can't begin to tell you how I felt inside on that day. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt I was about to begin my dream. How's it going? . . . stay tuned for more!

Until then . . . ready, set GO!

To teach or not teach . . .

Welcome to my first blog entry! I realized that I have a lot to say about educating today's youth, so I decided to create a blog where we could have discussions about such topics.

Parents, is it important for your child to . . .

Acquire effective communication skills
Develop positive relationships
Develop an understanding of emotional intelligence
Take responsibility of their thoughts, attitudes and actions to affect the outcome of certain events
Create measurable goals and objectives to reach those goals
Develop a vision for their lives
Learn presentation and public speaking skills
Express gratitude toward othersBuild self-confidence and self-esteem

As a former teacher at both the public and university level, I realize the benefit of teaching to the whole student. We need to empower each student to reach their fullest potential.

Students need more than just what’s taught in the classroom to be successful in today’s world. As adults in today’s work force, we need leadership and effective communication skills to keep up. Often times, these are skills that young people do not have coming out of high school. Comprehensive personal development is not built into most high school curricula. The training that is available is often only given to a select few. All teens should be involved to enhance their personal development and be competitive in today’s world.

My website at http://brookhartsolutions.com/ shares more about my feelings on this subject.

Check out my linkedin in profile at http://www.linkedin.com/in/teresamolter and read my success story at http://www.shapesofsuccess.com/T_MolterSuccess.html

Until next time . . .

Teresa Molter